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Personal Development & Self Confidence

michael.

By Michael McGrath Category: 0

Submit your Articles Here!

michael.mcgrath900@ntlworld.com.


Best regards

Michael McGrath
http://hypnosis.personal-development.info

Personal Development & Self Confidence
Self confidence, for many of us, is a nebulous feeling. It
is hard to quantify exactly what it is. It seems hard to
acquire but easy to dismantle. You can't really see it or
touch it but you know when someone has it and (usually)
when they don't. However, it is a state that is needed as a
foundation for building anything. So what is self
confidence anyway?

Self confidence begins with trust. It is trusting in your
own abilities, strengths and attributes. It is the ability
to take action and succeed. It is also the ability to take
action and fail without allowing the failure to reflect
badly on your own internal self of identity.

The true essence of self confidence lies in faith and
belief. The belief in your own abilities. It is having a
sense of self worth and feeling no less than anyone else.
Self confidence means that no matter what happens you know
that can deal with it. It is really having a sense of Self.
Knowing that you are OK just as you are, and knowing that
your imperfections are part of what makes up "you".

So what leads to a lack of confidence?

Well, each of us have a self-protection mechanism built
into us, and although this is much needed, it can cause
untold damage in other areas of our lives. There is a self
protection program that is hot-wired into the brain and
energy system of every living thing. It is there to protect
us from danger and it does this by replaying memories from
the past that caused us discomfort!

Let me explain with an example. If you touch a hot coal you
get burned and you know not to touch it again - your
self-protection mechanism kicks in. If you encounter a
red-hot coal in the future you keep your hands and body far
enough away so you don't feel the burning sensation and the
pain associated with it. Your subconscious mind programs
into your brain the fear of getting too close to hot coals.
This memory, or just the fear and pain connected to it, is
immediately evoked and sent to the conscious mind by the
subconscious when it feels you are in danger of getting
burnt. This mechanism, for self-preservation, has protected
you from an infant. However, as we will see, it can work
against in a myriad of ways.

Let's look at one. Say that, in the past, you tried to
perform a task and failed, only to be ridiculed or laughed
at by peers, family, friends or authority figures. This may
have embarrassed you and made you feel inadequate. Your
subconscious mind automatically stored this scenario and
the emotion associated with it in your memory through, what
are called, schemas. These are neural networks in the brain
that fire in sequence and send electrical impulses to the
body telling it to release certain chemicals (which produce
emotional responses). A neural connection is made between
the memory of the event and the emotion you felt at the
time. The problems arise when you are faced with a similar
situation in the future. The subconscious mind immediately
activates the schema and the neural network begins to
fire. Thus the subconscious mind replays the memory and the
original emotions are evoked in order to protect you! This
is done purely so that you do not feel belittled again.

For example, you may have tried to paint a picture. Your
friends around you laughed and ridiculed your efforts. This
caused you embarrassment and the feeling of being
ostracized like the "odd man out". You lacked the approval
of your peers. The subconscious mind immediately stored
this information in its memory banks ready to be replayed
in the future. 20 years later you still have a desire to
paint but won't even go to a night class to learn because
the thought of painting brings forth the emotions of
disapproval, embarrassment and fear. The subconscious mind
replays the emotions associated with the old memory even if
you can't recall the actual event ever having happened.
Your subconscious mind is, in effect, saying "don't paint
or you'll feel like this again!".

Usually such emotional memories stem back to childhood from
the time when you were most impressionable but not always.
You can just as easily encounter such problems when you are
an adult and the key to protecting yourself from such
negative influences is to develop a better sense of
yourself and build your confidence. This is at the very
core of all personal development and self improvement
techniques!

In reality you have no idea what the outcome will be when
you start something new . As an adult, you should be able
to try new things without the fear of what ridicule, or
condemnation from others, would do to your confidence.

Self confidence is having the ability to feel the fear and
do it anyway. In reality you have no idea what the outcome
will be when you perform a task that is new to you. By
developing your confidence however you are much more likely
to expect a positive outcome. Should you not have the
outcome you desire you are then capable of looking at the
situation realistically, determining what you need to learn
and develop in order to succeed at it or at least be able
to accept the fact that your are not suited to the activity
without "freaking out" about it.

Many people believe that you are either born with
confidence or you are not. The truth is we are all born
confident! You cried when you wanted something and believed
you were so important that you would get it. You tried to
walk several times while falling knowing that eventually
you would get it. This is confidence. Unfortunately this
kind of confidence is usually programmed out of us but it
is your NATURAL sate. It's time to get it back.

Firstly, you should be kind to yourself. Don't expect
perfection. Do you think Tiger Woods got a hole in one the
first time he played golf? Although he may have been born
with an innate ability at this sport chances are that the
first time he played he was terrible at it!

The thing that builds your confidence is trying things that
you haven't done before. Try to do something that scares
you. People with confidence are willing to try new things
not because they know they will succeed, but because they
don't give into their fear. If there was no fear or
uncertainty then there would only be knowing! Confidence is
not knowing but trying anyway.

The good news is that there are strategies and approaches
you can learn to build your confidence level to a new
all-time high. Once you learn these and begin to apply them
you will feel better able to try new things and enter new
situations. Then as you begin to succeed and realise that
the world didn't stop spinning because you faced your fear,
you will gain more and more confidence.

I would seriously advise you to seek out some tools to help
accelerate your confidence building. Hypnosis and emotional
releasing techniques can be invaluable. The personal
development industry has a myriad of products and you
should pick one that resonates with you. However, you have
all the power within that you need to change yourself from
the inside out. Make the decision now to face one fear a
week and do it. Your confidence will grow stronger than you
could ever have imagined.


----------------------------------------------------
http://www.angelfire.com/wizard2/release/personaldevelopment
- personal development products reviewed. We only review
products that work!
http://www.personal-development.info- reviews of the best
self confidence products available on the web. We find out
what works so you don't have to!


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